Here we go with another HMV special feature. Let me preface this by saying that I have a special place in my heart for Country Music, HOWEVER I am by no means an expert on the topic. Well that's never stopped me before... so here we go!
Intro song: Who ARE these people?? Seriously. I should know at least ONE of them.
Brad and Carrie host again! yaaa..y
Now a super-long Taylor Swift joke ... super long ... and then "I bet she won't write a song about it or anything." And then Jake, "I hate the fact that I find that funny." [laugh through my nose]
Say what you will about Carrie U., that girl is VERY comfortable in front of the mic. She is a natural host. Or MC. Can you call it an MC when it is Country, and 99.12% of the audience is white?
Single of the Year: Little Big Town! Jake called it! And it's called "Motorboating!" I actually really like this group. I think they have a lot more good stuff to come. But the Motorboating jokes are a bit much. Is this really so scandalous??
If you're still watching, let's start a drinking game. Every time they thank
Country music fans!
Country music [the amorphous being]!
...take a drink.
"What if Jennifer Nettles goes into labor?" ... Holy moly this joke landed on its FACE.
Tim McGraw performs. Man, here's the thing with Tim McG. I love him, I love his music, I loved Indian Outlaw before anybody knew it was racist (stop it, Spokane, you know it is). But do the fans of today still love Tim? I hope so. But sometimes when I watch the stars that I know and love from the 90's, I think about how it would be if *I* kept doing what I was doing 15 years ago. It would be ... I don't know ... ridiculous. Let's just start there. But the song is over now, and you know what? The man has still got it.
Vocal duo of the year goes to Thompson Squares. Wait, what was this category? Vocal duo huh?
Miranda Lambert performs. ML is a friend I would be scared to have. She is so cool that I would definitely do whatever she suggested. And you know she would suggest something just .... bad ass.
Ok, don't tell Jake, but the Zach Brown Band kind of reminds me him. If he was somehow forced to wear a beanie. And a big ol' bunch of stage make-up, yikes!
Another band?! Isn't this an awards show? Let's see who it is, Dirks....nope, already hit the fast-forward.
Ok, The Band Perry ... mark my words, this wild band of siblings is going somewhere. I'm not sure where, and I'm not sure if they will all do it together, but they have TALENT.
Song of the Year: Prediction: Over You, Miranda Lambert. YES! We both called it! Oh that song breaks my heart.
Taylor Swift performs. Oh boy, just when you think she couldn't possibly revive and regenerate the same song in a slightly different variation one more time....you know what? She does. But hey, this is the kind of stuff I would have just loved as a pre-teen. But not now... obviously... not anymore. Right?
Album of the Year: Prediction: Lady Antebellum. WHAT?! Eric So-and-So? He looks like goofy Johnny Knoxville in the Dukes of Hazard.
Faith Hill performs! Oh dear....she doesn't look quite...well? I feel too concerned to make jokes.
Vocal group of the year: Prediction: Little Big Town (Jake); The Band Perry (Hannah)......Jake wins again! He says he has some kind of formula that takes account of the rigging of the system. I don't know. But whoaaa, this band is feeling drunky drunk-drunk.
And speaking of feelings, I feel tired. Time to give this a rest and settle in for the night. Thanks for hanging on this long, y'all. AND THANK YOU COUNTRY MUSIC! WOO!! Thank you Jesus!